Starting the Food Revolution

Of all the things we could use in life, inspiration to make things better for our children is one we can use every day.

If you haven't already signed Jamie Oliver's petition, please do so. This is not about the perfect diet for your child, it's about a better diet for all children. Steps in the right direction need to be made and I hope signing the petition makes your day!

Lack inspiration to make a change in your environment, your kids and their future? Watch Jamie Oliver speak at TED!

People who don't exercise

Are the norm. Look at gym penetration rates, look in your park, ask your friends and coworkers. Then there are the ones who say they exercise, but the last time they did it was 4 weeks ago, and then there are the guys who can crank out 50 push ups, but alas, haven't done it since they did military service back in 1975.

So who are the exercisers? Those less than 10% of the population who exercise half as frequently as they brush their teeth? The ones who hike on the weekends? The ones who have less heart disease, rarely develop diabetes and enjoy wearing smaller size clothes than the rest of the population? They are the ones who actually enjoy being active.

I don't care what got you to exercise in the first place, whether it was because your parents showed you into the karate studio, whether it's because you lost weight for your prom, or because you married a marathon runner, what kept you in the gym, on the track, on the trail, or on a stationary bike in front of your TV was the fact that somehow you ended up enjoying exercise. You might enjoy the journey, or the end destination, but there is a feeling of happiness, fulfillment and enjoyment connected with it.

Of course, you'll say you know someone who hates exercising but does it because they have to. So how could they enjoy it? Well, they enjoy what they see in the mirror, or how productive they are after a workout, or how energized they feel, or how their backs don't ache anymore. Whatever the reason, they get some pleasure out of it.

So what have you found in exercise? Are you still using it for punishment after bigger meals? Are you still using it for anger management? Do you loathe going to the gym and what are you doing to change that into the simple joy of being able to move and create a healthier happier you?

More about the active lifestyle, here:

Fast Food Snob

I am one. So what?

I remember way back when I watched a John Berardi lecture, where he explained what a perfect day was. You wake up, you have your perfectly planned balanced breakfast, your post workout shake, your prepacked lunch, you afternoon snack in your car, then a great healthy perfectly acid base balanced dinner...and then you think oh I am having a perfect day, and another one, and another one, and then life happens.

Then you come home, starved, dehydrated, you've missed the last three meals, you are so stress ridden from traffic your hands are shaking, your back aches and you can barely remember waking up...was that even today? There are days, when you can't wait to get your veggies out of the fridge and cut them up, where all the meat looks bland, and the thought of an egg sounds like too much work to even start cracking on. If you were a normal person, you would have gone through the local drive through and enjoyed your local choice of fast food. А burger, or two, with fries, or not. Me...I'm a fast food snob, so I go by the store, pick up the best whole wheat bread with apples and cinnamon, a pack of the most delicious gourmet goat cheese, some fresh butter and I am off home, to make two pieces of toast with plenty of great tasting cheese and enjoy it with a glass of very well chilled Pinot Grigio. 100% satisfaction 0% crap 200% fast food.

Midnight Biker

I was coming home from a late dinner tonight and driving, I saw a guy on a bike, going pretty fast. He was wearing jeans and sneakers and t-shirt, no helmet or protection. He proceeded to ride in front of me, took a turn around my building and went to the playground they built for skating, biking and rollerblading. Picture the extreme competition type platforms.

As I was walking home from my car, I was listening to him do jumps and turns and flips...with no protection, in the middle of the night.

What drove him there? The midnight cool air. The lack of other kids. The feeling of being alone under the light with no one to watch. No one to watch him mess up. Yet no one to watch him do his best flip. Maybe he just had a fight with his friends and needs to be left alone. Maybe he's celebrating his new bike, or the start of summer break. Whatever he's doing, he can do that thing alone. I silently admire that. I have the same admiration for the 7 a.m. guy that I see in the gym, and the busy mom who ran for her appointment with me in her lunch break. Hats off to all these people for staying in touch with their bodies.

Buffet lunches, large waistlines and other jiggly thoughts...

This is a small dessert spoon. It's sitting on top of my coffee cup. The small dent in it is all I ate of that artificial tasting cube of jello, one of the desserts at a Sunday buffet. There wasn't really much choice, brownies, ice cream, strawberry mousse, muffins, apples and oranges.

There were all sorts of people at the buffet: families with macaroni and cheese eating kids, moms with lettuce laden plates, dads with two bowls of chili each...and then there were the really really large people next to our booth.

We were starved and exhausted from working out when we got there, so each of us got salad with plenty of cheese, soups with the most meat and some corn bread. We splurged on a piece of bread each, and I had two slices of orange for desert, while my partner had some ice cream. I did want to try the jello and you can tell how great it was from the picture of the leftover of my first and only serving of it. As I was trying to take that photo, I noticed that the girl from large couple sitting next to us was enjoying another serving of dessert, after ice cream. She was having 10 of these same jello things that I had just tried. They were the most nutritionally empty choice she could have made, given there were apples, ice cream and cottage cheese...so I wondered is it that people have no choice. I will admit that I love watching heavier people eat and shop because it gives me an insight into their choices and the power they have to choose what's good for them and what's not. This girl had already chosen a pink sugar drink, baked potato with chili and sour cream and cheese and now was digging into a second desert. Given the metabolic and mental complications most bigger people have to deal with, I can imagine those choices didn't help.

We can argue until tomorrow on the health and genetic origins of being heavier and having a hard time losing weight, but when you watch a couple engaging in the same behavior you can't ignore the strong relationship. Could we be the larger couple? Sure. We would just have to choose to not exercise and eat at much as we want at the buffets we go to. Oh, and I might need to learn to like jello.

No bottomless bowl

During a lecture at last week's Fitness Retreat we were discussing how much is enough to satisfy a craving. In the context of emotional eating, where we are filling a nearly bottomless pit, the answer is closer to infinity. And yes, every conscious eater finds the following to be true:

whether you have a little or a lot, you eventually come to the end

It could be the end of a piece of candy, a red vine, a bar of chocolate, a box of chocolates, the bottom of a box of ice cream, your safe stash of super duper healthy double organic raisins, or a bottle of juice, sooner or later, 50 or 500 or 2500 calories later, it's over, diet goals be damned.

In Mindless Eating, a brilliant book I picked up last year, they invariably show that if food is available and easy to see, it will be eaten. If you are one of those people that come home with the intent to eat clean only to finish off a bar of chocolate that was meant to last a week, consider the following no bottomless bowl laws:

1. Sooner or later, you've eaten it all. You'll digest it, assimilate it and some of it will go on top of your hard earned muscle. You'll see abs "some other time" as we say in Bulgarian. Knowing this, choose to beat the quantity, not the quality. Have a piece of chocolate, fully conscious that one more won't add more taste or more satisfaction, it will add more time to your goal. It will add more fat to your body. More dissatisfaction, more sacrifice. You don't want it THAT bad. Limit yourself to 10% of your calories for the day in happy foods and you've had enough.

2. Doughnuts aren't love. We all need to feel good. It just so happens that most feel good foods are not feel lean foods. Face the feelings that overwhelm you at moments when you want to eat. Find alternate ways to show yourself that you love your body and you give it the best it deserves. Some of us want to mask a feeling, by coating it with a thick layer of sugar, others want to make food disappear, because they want to make a problem disappear. Honestly, will it?

3. It's all in your head. Have you even spent the afternoon thinking of going home and destroying whatever is in the fridge. Taking a break. Doing it all for fun. Sometimes the thought of food excites us so much that it paints a picture we crave even more. Try this simple NLP exercise. Imagine your food like it's on a TV screen, watch it and think of how you are going to enjoy it. Then make the image black and white and shrink it to the bottom right of the screen until it's so tiny you almost can't see it. This simple tricks works great. If it doesn't work, go back to law 1 and use the 10% rule.

There is really no magic to beating emotional eating, sometimes it takes months and years to face the real issues behind it, if one is willing and patient, but I have seen the damage from food minimized, until real solutions present themselves.

Survival of the fittest

I've just been back from a half a day of work and running errands, that started at 6 a.m. and now, at 2 p.m. I am ready for a glass of hot tea, or better yet, a glass of hot whiskey, hoping it will bring my heart rate down. Why the physical over stimulation?

I start my day early, walking probably 100 feet to my car. I spend a serious amount of time uncovering it from thick snow. It's cold, the wind is blowing and I want to be somewhere else, like my bed, or at least a place with no winter. In my moonboots, I dig through snowdrifts to come back to my building, where I hastily fit in an early morning conversation, getting ready for work, grabbing meals in ziplocks, talking on the phone and getting dressed all at the same time. With 3 bags and a thermos of coffee, I make my way into the blizzard, get to my car and find it's covered again, so I uncover it one more time.

After about 10 minutes of snow and straining to find the path to drive in the tracks of other unfortunate cars, I finally stop shivering with cold and I can almost feel my hands on the wheel.

Half an hour of traffic jams and avoiding traffic accidents later, I arrive at the parking lot at the gym, far away from the entrance. Moonboot walkining again, and running for my late appointment with a client. Two workouts later, I run some errands, ending with shopping and carrying heavy grocery bags an unnamed distance to my covered in snow car...oh not again. I'm cold, tired from walking in the snow and whiny like a city girl.

I sit in my car, find that two or three contracts aren't going on time for me to meet some financial issues, talk to a few people that are wishy-washy, avoid some accidents, plough through more snow and dirt and after 100 feet of moonboot walking I am home.

I am officially wiped out and I still have half a work day ahead of me. Post office, workouts, lots of driving, picking up packages...

I am mentally and physically destroyed not by the tasks of today, but by the physical demands of this thick white cold natural mess that is this city. I think of myself as a wimp, but then think of оur ancestors, who only had the physical stressors, no meetings to be late for, no late payments, no deadlines and definitely no cars to uncover.

The paradox is that I am actually in shape to meet the demands of uncovering cars, walking through thick snow, facing the wind and doing it a few times today. What happens with all the people who never exercise? Your average Sofia computer bound guy?

I have no clue, and I hope I never find out for myself.

COLOR

I came upon a site of inspirational value. Life is so much about color, sound and touch. We need to think less and perceive more. In your training, in your driving, in your touching, be aware.

Look at the sky:It's estimated that we do as much as 90% of our daily activities using matrices and patterns than we have adopted in the past, without much thought of reason, feeling or understanding. Putting awareness back into simple things is key to success in a life that moves faster than we do. Whether you want to be a better trainer, father, partner or manager, putting awareness back into simple daily tasks will bring you amazing insight, free you of the pressure of tasks and bring joy back.

My favorite awareness drills:

1. Looking for small detail, for example, checking out the patterns in floor tile and details in shoes.

2. Listening to your own breathing and being aware of the feeling of breath on your lips and in your nose while lifting weights.

3. Smelling minor smells

4. Listening for sounds that are covered up by louder sounds, like birds singing in the city

5. Listening to your heart before falling asleep

My favorite thing today is to look at color. For more color:
Whole site here!

On self renewal - “The Turn of the Tide”

Sometimes you end up doing two things simultaneously that just fit together perfectly. I was listening to Norah Jones and at the same time I was reading the story below, it's a classic worth passing on!

“The Turn of the Tide” by Arthur Gordon

Arthur Gordon tells of a time in his life when he began to feel that everything was stale and flat. His enthusiasm had all but disappeared; his writing efforts were fruitless, and the situation was getting worse day by day.

Finally, he decided to get help from a medical doctor. Observing nothing physically wrong, the doctor asked him if he would be able to follow his instructions for one day. When Gordon replied that he could, the doctor told him to spend the following day in a place where he was the happiest as a child. He could take food, but he was not to talk to anyone or to read or write or listen to the radio. He then wrote out four prescriptions and told him to open one at nine, twelve, three, and six o’clock.

“Are you serious?” Gordon asked him.

“You won’t think I’m joking when you get my bill!” was the reply.

So the next morning, Gordon went to the beach. As he opened the first prescription, he read, “Listen carefully.” He thought the doctor was insane! How could he listen for three hours? Nevertheless, he had agreed to follow the doctor’s order, so he listened. He heard the usual sounds of the sea and the birds. After a while, he could hear the other sounds that weren’t so apparent at first. As he listened, he began to think of lessons the sea had taught him as a child—patience, respect, and an awareness of the interdependence of things. He began to listen to the sounds—and the silence—and to feel a growing peace deep within.

At noon, he opened the second slip of paper and read, “Try reaching back.” “Reaching back to what?” he wondered. Perhaps to childhood, perhaps to memories of joy. He tried to remember them with exactness, and in remembering, he found a growing warmth inside.

At three o’clock, he opened the third piece of paper. Until now, the prescriptions had been easy to take, but this one was different; it said, “Examine your motives.” At first he was defensive. He thought about what he wanted—success, security, recognition—and he justified them all. Yet then the thought occurred to him that those motives weren’t good enough. That perhaps therein was the answer to his stagnant situation. He considered his motives deeply and thought about past happiness, and at last, the answer came to him. In a flash of certainty, he wrote, “I saw that if one’s motives are wrong, nothing can be right. It makes no difference whether you are a mail carrier, a hairdresser, an insurance salesperson, a home-maker—whatever. As long as you feel you are serving others, you do the job well. When you are concerned only with helping yourself, you do it less well—a law as unrelenting as gravity.”

When six o’clock came, the fourth prescription didn’t take long to fill. “Write your worries on the sand,” it said. He knelt and wrote several words with a piece of broken shell; then he turned and walked away. He didn’t look back: he knew the tide would come in!

If you need to, take a day like that. If you don't have time to, make time, life is short.

A thought to start your day

Goethe taught, "Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and should be and he will become as he can and should be."
As personal trainers and coaches, we work as problem solvers, so we tend to classify people. We live our professional lives very much like we live our social lives, we have our hidden fears, prejudices, ways to feel secure. We dissect, piece things up, find solutions and look for results. We are goal driven.
Today, take a minute a think what drives each person that you meet. How can you treat them as responsible, growing, learning and searching individuals, barring all prejudices and personal judgment. Look for their inner fire and don't put it out by being a problem solver.

Тony Robbins tells Rocky story

"The greatest revenge is massive success"

А story about who you are, and about how you persevere is more important than what anybody says to you. I love it. It's also a story about how you should never sell your dog, unless it ends up with a movie part.

The imdb wants me - part II

Another day of filming. My scene was rushing into a room, finding a girl, covered in blood and a guy with his guts out. I scream, then collapse in a corner. Police rushes in.

I was very nervous about this scene. I had to do a lot of visual facial acting, not so much doing acting. I had to scream, I had no idea how.

When it came right down to it, I produced a series of very loud scary screams, ones I had no idea I could do. What really amazed me is that waiting between cuts, I was shivering and scared. Screaming made my hair stand on end, I was defensive and felt a bit like an animal being chased.
That reminded me that I had another lesson today.

It's what you perceive as real, not what is real, that shapes your present.

Your body reacts to everything you think and do as if were the actual truth.

You don't have to prepare for situations you've never been in. If it's about staying alive in any sense of the word, you already know what to do.

All the more reason to get real in life, my friends :)

The imdb wants me

I got a role in a movie. A two day part, playing a girl named Katie. She works at a college, and in the scene we shot today, she is picking up the clothes of a recently killed girl. The movie is a horror sequel to Boogyman 2 and is the number 3 in a series I will never watch. 5 hours of shooting. My first movie, ever. Looking back, I see my paycheck and my name on imdb is not all I am walking away with. It's all about experience in this level of existence, or we would be better born as seaweed.

Never be afraid of doing something for the first time
Whether it's talking up the guy next door, learning how to perform a task, studying a line, going for a job interview, pulling a heavy weight, it's all about doing it. If you are afraid, chances are you'll fail. There is nothing to be afraid of, when you are performing at your best.

Pay attention to detail
Because if you don't someone else will and eventually you'll have to do the same thing over and over and over again until you get it right. You get that special chance on camera, but in life it's rare, so keep your eyes open.

Look at things from all angles
See the big picture first, then try to see it from the point of view of each participant. Empathize, merge, relive. When you have it all covered, you'll make the best decisions. If you are stuck in a situation, always, always look at it from every point of view.

Know your whys
Whenever you do or say something, whenever you look at someone, smile, cry, touch or attack, always as yourself "why am I doing this?". And you better have a good reason, because how healthy , happy and successful you are largely depends on being you, a justified you, in every minute.

Look for the good in people and tell them about it
If someone just did something for you, don't just say thank you. Say why you appreciate it. Have you done that, today?

Have patience
A great moment might be in store for you, but if you don't have the patience to wait for it, you might never enjoy it. Know that good energy put to work, combined with patience, will always get you more than just hard work. You'll have times when you're fed up with waiting, but do know that those times will end.

Rest like a king
When hard work is over, rest. Put your feet up, have a drink and look forward to another day of lessons.

The body image Grinch

I closely observe how judgmental people can be of others’ looks. While the politically correct spirit of today forces us in the right direction, in my culture, it’s acceptable to make a negative remark of someone’s looks. While this fact doesn’t make it more pleasurable, the holiday season abounds in body shape judgments. Take for example a family get together for Christmas Eve. Food abounds, people are jolly and merry and someone says:” hey, don’t you think Joe is a tad heavier, he’s grown a belly or something”. Or take my high school class reunion from last night. We hadn’t seen each other in 9 years. First thing a guy says is: “hey, aren’t you a bit heavy for someone who works out?”. While Bulgarian culture is known for not making a difference between muscle and fat, and girls you see in the street have the body composition of a gummy bear, this is not exactly what I want to hear. Being a girl, all sorts of memories from high school body image issues resurface, and I have to spend half of my last day of Christmas vacation, fighting them and bringing myself to normalcy.

I have discussed this many times with clients, since the same things happens to them over and over again, and while the small imperfections that prove that people are not walking billboards don’t normally bother us, finding that they bother our closest friends and relatives is definitely a holiday downer. I call those body image critique specialists body image Grinches (BIGrinches), because they tend to steal the spirit of the holiday season. Funny enough, they are often the ones that don’t like to be in the BIGrinch’s spotlight.

At the same time, a lot of us have reason to be one way or another, and while some changes in body composition are often the result of being inactive and having a poor diet, the target of the BIGrinch might just be another person going through a hard situation or fighting through a time of bad health in their life. So think twice before you pass your judgment on:

Cousin Pete – over the past few years every time you see him for Easter of Christmas he looks like he’s working out, but he always eats too much, looks tired and he has a beer belly. He doesn’t drink, which makes it even weirder. This Christmas he looks strong and fit, his arms and legs look great, but his belly is bigger than ever. What you didn’t know is that he has diabetes type II and the triglyceride levels of a 70 year old heart patient. He feels tired all the time, so getting to the gym takes him a lot of effort, he is still not used to his medication and feels a bit depressed over losing his favorite foods. Not chatty this year, Pete? Let’s see if poking some fun at you over the arctic survival pack is going to make it better.

Aunt Lila – whatever happened to that happy, vital spirit? Aunt Lila looks tired and down. She’s gained at least 20 lbs since Easter and she’s lost some of her wonderful hair. She has bags under her eyes. You ask her if she has problems with eating too much sweets, and she breaks down. What you don’t know is that she has gastritis, which doesn’t let her absorb vitamin B, she is on antidepressants because uncle Jack is cheating on her and she sent her kids off to college this fall. See if her pounds will magically melt off if you buy her a gym membership. No worries, you have a whole year to think of another gift.

Your mom – you haven’t seen her in three months. You take her shopping and find out that she now wears a size larger than the last time you did that together. It’s sad in the changing room and you know better than to make a witty remark of her growing waistline. She’s been on a diet this whole time, to no avail. Her waist to hip ratio has grown and since you know that she has a history of thyroid problems, you get her a doctor’s appointment. Smart kid!

Your nephew Jim – he used to be the coolest kid in school, smart, strong and on the basketball team. His skin looks thin and pale, he doesn’t smile and looks like he hasn’t slept in months. He’s gained some weight in his hips and chest and he looks wimp and unmotivated. What he doesn’t want you to know is that he was just diagnosed with a hormonal imbalance and his testosterone has hit rock bottom. See if getting him a beer will cheer him up, don’t think so!

Your sister-in-law Gina – she’s a fitness trainer, former volleyball player and the high school beauty. She won a pageant once. You want to mention something about her hips, they always seemed sort of out of proportion with the rest of her body and those arms, they just can’t be all muscle. She is no longer a teenager and her job makes it hard on her to keep in the best shape possible. What you don’t know is that she has an estrogen imbalance, a metabolic condition where her body cannot utilize estrogen properly, so her thighs look big and bulky, while she boasts flat and beautiful abs. Don’t mention thunder thighs, unless you want to test her kung-fu.

So, the next time you see the ones you love most, don't steal the holiday spirit. Better yet, focus on you!

Thinking vs. Doing

thoughts on training smart people

I had an interesting conversation with one of my clients today. She's in her early 30s, a successful university professor and thriving architect. Wе were discussing how results in the gym are very much related to other results in other spheres of life. If one is successful and responsible as a business person, they usually apply the same qualities that got them where they are in business, to training and nutrition. They will invest their money, time and effort wisely and walk out in better shape and better health. However, there is a catch. A vast majority of successful and intelligent individuals will transfer their habit of thinking to become successful instead of doing to become successful to their training. And this is where they'll fail. Changing and improving your body has a lot more to do with doing than with just thinking about it. I know people that overanalyze, weigh in plans, approaches and more and never get to actually acting out the plan. In business this would be fatal, and since there is no punishment for lack of immediate action in the gym, most people practice this forever and that takes them to me. Now I can act on their plans.

To sum up:

Thinking + Action = sucesss

Brilliant Idea + No Action = possible success in a future moment

Act more on things related to your body! Whatever ideas and plans you have, start putting in the time today. There's no tomorrow when it comes to you!

Sources of strength

When it comes to living, lifting, playing and following your dreams you can't succeed without the basic pillars of strength. Here, body and mind become one, so it's hard to say which fuels which:

*Food - eat well and you know your results will follow. You'll think better, perform better and look like you deserve for your hard work!
*Supplements - take your fish oil. Just do it!
*Water - a gallon a day keeps you well hydrated, alert and productive, do it!
*Caffeine - I don't consider a drink than makes me feel better, lift heavier and stay awake when I am spotting a client at 7 p.m. bad for me. On the contrary - I enjoy a few cups of coffee each day, just make sure it's mostly organic and I mix decaf and regular in a 1:1 ratio so I don't overdo it and become jittery!
*Sleep - we don't get enough - sleep as long as possible and as often as possible. Mini naps are a killer solution! I had one on our balcony this afternoon and it changed my whole day! Better hormonal regulation, faster recovery and easier fat loss are not to miss!
*Reading- anything from your internet t-nation articles to a good book of fiction will feed your soul the necessary nutrients to thrive, grow and learn. Learning something everyday is what makes you tick!
*Training- one of the core experiences, along with falling in love, finding a soul mate, having children and saving the planet from global warming! We had a discussion about the enjoyment from sex and workouts today. Training is a solo, well-planned battle you win each time! You can't beat it!
*Being responsible- recycle, reuse, support local farmers. Giving back to the planet is a blessing, and experiencing it is easy.
*Allowing to get inspired - let people push your good buttons, let them inspire you! Spend as much time as possible with people you like, admire and enjoy. Learn and grow, charge your batteries as often as possible!
*Spend time in nature - immerse yourself in nature at least every few days. You don't need to go hiking. Watching the bushes outside your window, and appreciating life and nature will do just fine!
*Family time - make sure you communicate with family members, take them out, send them packages, organize surprise parties for them, do anything to see them and appreciate them
*Respect your body- treat your body with love, and it will speak back to you. Never complain with how it looks, never speak bad to it. Your body will always reflect how you treat it and address it.
*Visualize - see everything you want to achieve before you set on the path to achieving it. Images are powerful means. Fill your thoughts with the things and emotions you want to attract and they will come to you!

Comfort Zones

Personal training has a lot to do with comfort zones. I think of them as still frames of (not necessarily) pleasant satisfaction with the world. They are heavily defined by familiarity. Sometimes your comfort zone is a place of comfort only compared to other zones. You can find comfort in misery, self-pity, guilt, sympathy, work, ambition, even mediocrity. A key function of comfort is that it freezes change and doesn't allow one to grow. Personal growth is the truest reflection of inner desires and dreams. Sometimes people drift into comfort zones they don't even consider natural, but familiarity makes them easy to accept over time.

dream-->desire-->breaking-->action-->end result-->feedback-->corrected action

Breaking equals acting. As a personal trainer I deal with action, and I teach people to act on their dreams. Whether it's asking for help, inviting the girl next door out to coffee, changing your job or changing your body, act now. Practice stopping the still frame that life sometime becomes.
Do you have a dream you haven't fulfilled? Do you have a goal you haven't reached? Write down the steps to achieving your dream or getting to your goal and act by breaking the familiarity of today. Dare to challenge, learn, succeed or fail.

A trip with the end in sight

I was traveling on a bus back to Sofia this weekend. The vehicle was meant for 20 passengers, yet somehow held over 40 of which I was one - stuck way back at the end with a wonderful book, smiling neighbors and the determined desire to last the trip which promised to be hot and stuffy. It was more than that, there were swirls of humidity and droplets of heat that danced like crazy around me. I took my hat off, and sank deeper in my book, knowing the end of the trip was near. 3 hours is not a long time, I thought.
Sometimes you have a goal that you can clearly see, yet when you set off to reach it, you find yourself thrown mercilessly out of your comfort zone, way out there. It takes the secure knowledge of a promised happy end for you to stay and persevere. It's crucial then, to be on the right bus.

The Future of Stubborn Fat

Looking in the mirror every morning I see little positive changes in body composition, nicer deeper curves of muscle or gentler skin folds here and there and then I rejoice, I leave for work triumphant.
At work the scale awaits. God forbid the possessed instrument shows a higher number than the one I have carefully implanted in my sensitive female brain and my dreams all turn to dust.
This is still a part of me. The little ballerina wanting to dance in the front row, the part that was told if you weigh less you dance in front and if you work really really hard and then if you weighed less that the others...well, then, the sky is the limit. It's also the part that gave me discipline, direction, focus and unusual patience, so it's not all bad.
I have taught hundreds of women to throw the scale away, to look in the mirror and celebrate the growing beauty that their leaner self brings. I've taught them to disregard numbers, cultivate happiness and focus on action rather than observation.
I sometimes become aware of my own emotional dependence on numbers and just sit and marvel at the little ballerina that won't grow up.
Last night I was listening to the fat loss teleconference that Bill Hartman had and later lied in bed thinking the only thing that separates regular fat from stubborn fat is time.

(time x effort)+happiness = change